Praise God

I had a bit of a scare this afternoon. Lydia started choking while eating lunch. I didn't panic initially-- when it has happened with the kids before, I know they just need to work it out by themselves (as long as they're still breathing). But as I was watching her and holding up an arm (a neighbor just told me about that last week), she stopped breathing and started turning purple. Thankfully, in the quick instance that I started to remove her from the high chair, she worked it out. It was a Disney DVD Bingo chip. The game was intact on the shelf so a chip must have found its way into one of her baskets of toys. And she obviously had it tucked in her cheek when I placed her in the high chair for lunch. Swallowing pears with a bingo chip doesn't work too well--

So scary.

I just put her to bed for the night. While rocking and looking at her precious face, I was reminded of what could have happened. Thank you, Jesus. Thanks for my little girl-- and thanks for protecting her.

I'm Just a Mom

Contrary to popular belief in this house, I'm not Wonderwoman. I can't leap tall buildings in a single bound, I can't be two places at the same time, a net doesn't fly out of my hands when I need something in another room, I don't bust out of my shirt and turn green when I'm trying to carry Jonah and Lydia simultaneously, and on occasion, I just may need to stop and rest.

I'm not a superhero--

And I would never wear those red boots.

The Bottomless Pit

a.k.a. Little Miss Lydia

Would you believe she ate half of a large sweet potato, a whole kiwi, and a chunk of cheese for lunch? Someone is growing...

Tap

I hate to miss tap class. So when I walked into class tonight, I taped my teacher performing the step they learned last week when I was gone. Thankfully, it's very simple.

For those of you that wonder what I do, here's a sample look at a step slowed down DRASTICALLY.


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I'm expecting a large cheering section at recital this year. Actually, that's a lie. I adore my class, but I could do without the performance.

At least I won't be eight months pregnant...

She's Officially Crawling...

...and doesn't know whether to laugh or cry!

My Sensational Boy

A whole new world has opened up for me this past week. Last Thursday night I attended Jonah's school conference. I was a little nervous at first-- worried that they were going to recommend Jonah stay in the special education program. They do want him to stay another year, but I was assured by his teacher that they're hoping to teach him to "self-regulate" next year so that he could move into regular education. She acknowledged that he was bright and capable, and for that, I am grateful. But I left the meeting realizing that, on a daily basis, we forget to acknowledge how much of his behavior is out of his control. When I'm trying to fix dinner and feed Lydia and Jonah is climbing, yet again, on top of the kitchen counter, it's easy to forget that he needs to climb. So it was perfect timing that we discovered the latest book about Sensory Integration Dysfuction (now called Sensory Processing Disorder) called "Sensational Kids."

My eyes were opened. As I read, tears filled my eyes. I was encouraged, relieved, and overwhelmed.

It feels like the whole book was written about Jonah. We knew he was sensitive to noise and lights, but I learned that Jonah is primarily considered a "sensory seeker." Of course! It all makes sense!

"Some degree of sensory seeking is normal in children as they learn, grow, and try to master new challenges, but children like [Jonah] are extreme in their quest. On a playground or in an amusement park, they may seek out a scary ride that other children approach with apprehension, and then gleefully return to it over and over, as if they can't get enough stimulation. At school, they clown around by throwing themselves against a wall and falling to the floor with such violence that supervising adults worry they'll hurt themselves. When their quest for sensation is thwarted, children who crave sensation can become extremely demanding-- even explosive. Most children can be a little wild at times, but the thrill-seeking of these children is well beyond average...[they are] not 'mean' or 'bad,' but people sometimes apply these labels because such children behave in ways that distress those around them....The dichotomy between [the child's] aggressive and upsetting sensation seeking and his equally energetic and endearing affection creates conflict in the people around him. Sensory seekers are often responsive, creative, and fun to be around. They can be immensely enjoyable. But when their drive for sensory stimulation is running their lives and running the lives of those around them, they can be overhelming, too."

Can you believe how perfectly this describes my son? It makes so much sense. No wonder he's bored at home. No wonder he's such an angel with new experiences. No wonder he rides big roller coasters five times in a row at the amusement park. No wonder he can be difficult and endearing at the same time. No wonder he's a daredevil in the skatepark. No wonder he wants to swing and play in the rain and spin in circles... He's seeking to fulfill sensory needs.

So after discovering this new information, we've tried some new techniques the past couple of days when it's not practical to leave the house. I've made him carry groceries, wear his weighted vest, carry large books, knock me over, jump on the couch/bed, etc. And it's worked wonderfully!

He certainly is a sensational kid!

Dirt Be Gone

Mike has dreamed of owning a Dyson vacuum cleaner for the past year. His dream came true on Sunday. The allergist informed us last week that Jonah has a serious allergy to dust mites so Mike finally had a good excuse to spend the money.

Let me just say, we have never been so excited to vacuum our home. The picture shows what the Dyson picked up in our bedroom after the carpet was freshly vacuumed with our Hoover Wind Tunnel. Can you believe it? That's the dirt it picked up in ONE room!! This clean freak is giddy!

Nashvegas

Although exhausted from a long travel day, the weekend was refreshing. Some highlights for me include:

- shopping
- sleeping without interruption
- straightening my hair :)
- conversations with friends
- long dinners

I learned a few things this weekend. I learned that I still don't like to stay out late (every party needs a pooper). I learned that my friend Becky is the coolest chic on the planet. I learned that I regress to my college personality when I'm with my college friends. I learned that our environment has shaped who we have become.

And I learned that I miss my kids when I'm not with them.

Recess

"You've probably heard analogies about life being like a book, with each stage of development occupying its own chapter. During your early life, you eagerly scribbled out your contribution on the clean pages of the first few chapters. But with the arrival of children, your own journaling changes its focus some, and also offers the time and space for you to help your child hold his crayon, poised and eager to write in his book of days....Rather than setting your own journal completely aide for these next few years of child rearing, why not carefully slot time to record a few paragraphs-- perhaps a single page and even a whole chapter?"

I read this quote last week in a book entitled "What Every Mom Needs" (okay, the English teacher in me is wincing at the fact that I just put that book in quotes instead of underlining it, but I don't know how to underline through this program on my Mac). It was perfect timing. I intend to write a paragraph in my life book this weekend when I fly to Nashville to spend time with college friends.

We've planned an annual girls' weekend since 1996. There's something easy about spending time with girls who knew me during those college years. Sure, we're different people than we were 11 years ago, but it doesn't matter.

We never have a definite plan of what we're going to do, but some of the potential activities, according to our lovely hostess, include:

shopping
a special art exhibit
manicures
Justin Timberlake concert

So pardon my blogging recess. I'm going to write a paragraph in MY book-- I'll be a better mom when I return.

Mr. Princess

I've said recently that at this stage in Jonah's life, he's a follower. If the kids around him are behaving, than he'll behave too. If the boys are aggressive, than he'll be aggressive too. If the girls are playing dress-up, than he'll play dress-up too!

Where's the Gun?

I am the antithesis of an animal lover. I never had a pet, and I'm allergic to them. I literally lose my appetite when I think about animals. (I had a student once that bought me Dixie cups with cats on them just to be funny. I didn't find much humor in it.)

As a child I was bit by a dog while walking home from Leslie Wetherington's house. The way I remember it, the dog had a dead animal in its mouth at the time it gnashed its teeth into my leg. I didn't go to the emergency room so the wound probably wasn't that bad, but the point is, I remember telling Mike before our engagement, "It's either me or a pet, because, honey, you'll never have one if you're married to me.

So when I was awakened this morning at 6:00 a.m. by human-like cries of some mangy white cat that's been hanging out on our front porch, I was less than thrilled. "Where's the gun?" I asked Mike. He didn't answer.

I guess I have a bit of my grandpa lurking in the depths of me. I'd like to bury this cat alive.

*****
Okay animal lovers, can we still be friends?

Watch out World!

Lydia is eight months old today...and she's on a mission! It's amazing how inquisitive she's become in the past week. Her latest interests include: playing with diapers, crawling backwards, feeding herself grapes (peeled and quartered, of course), playing peek-a-boo by herself, holding her arms high to say that she's "so big," and constantly moving when Mommy is trying to take pictures.

Banned

I hate Spongebob Squarepants. I refuse to let Jonah watch it. If he's going to watch television than I'd much rather him watch Blues Clues or Dora the Explorer. That got me thinking about shows my parents wouldn't let me watch. Would you believe that my mom, for a time, woudn't let me watch Growing Pains. Hello? Didn't Kirk Cameron grow up to play Buck in the Left Behind series?

What's greatly ironic about this is that I watched Three's Company every day after school. My mom was obviously making dinner and not very aware of the show's content. So I wonder... what awful thing would I have learned from the Seaver family?

Now Hiring

I've decided I want a laundry maid. My life would be so much easier. I wouldn't need to take 20 trips down the basement stairs, I woudn't spend every "free" moment folding clothes, and Mike would always have neatly ironed shirts (I'm assuming my laundry maid would do the ironing too).

Resumes will be accepted until 3/18/2007.

Everyone Has a Twin?

I recently saw a 20/20 show about look-a-likes. The idea is that someone, somewhere looks just like you. A Canadian photographer, Francois Brunelle, has been taking pictures of these "twins" and compiling them for a book. Here's an example of his work:


I have another recommendation for his book.

Mike:

Rainn Wilson:

What do you think?

Cold #2834

Miss Lydia is terribly congested and miserable. I think she's had a cold most of the winter. My goal today was to keep her happy.

Nothing worked: rocking, walking around the house, singing, eating Cheerios, watching Jonah, listening to the vacuum, etc.

What worked? Watching Baby Einstein snuggled under her blanket. She was actually content for 20 minutes.

Perhaps I should fan our adorble Queen of Sheba while Jonah feeds her some grapes.

Just Call Me Alexander

When I got out of bed this morning I heard Jonah dumping over his basket of instruments and Lydia whining in her room and I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

While attempting to get out the door, Jonah decided he didn't want any help untying his shoes. I said he needed to let me help him. I said he was a big boy. I said I could untie his shoes for him, and he threw a huge tantrum.

I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

I could tell because the "car carts" were all being used at the grocery store, and I barely had any room in the normal cart for food since both kids were wearing their winter coats.

It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

That's what it was because while attepting to make dinner tonight with Lydia in the Bjorn and Jonah on the step-stool, I misread the recipe and messed up the meal. Try it again next week, Mike said.

Next week, I said, I'm going to Australia.

While eating my last-minute dinner, Jonah decided he had to sit on his jumperoo and while taking a bath he had a meltdown and we ended up with more bathwater on the floor than the tub.

I am having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day, I told everybody. No one even answered.

We pay bills every Wednesday night and I hate paying bills.

Lydia won't go to sleep, I keep stepping in pieces of my failed dinner Jonah put on the floor, and I still have laundry to fold. I hate folding laundry.

Mike says some days are like that.

Even in Australia.

Snowfight with Daddy, Second Try

For those of you who couldn't see the picture:


While walking in the door I heard Mike say, "I'm sorry, Jonah, for hitting you in the face with an ice ball."

I chose not to comment.

It Won't Be Long...

I am so looking forward to my flower garden this year. With the addition of Lydia last year, I just wasn't able to concentrate much on this new love. But the other day I heard birds singing and I instantly thought, "FLOWERS!" I am most excited to see:
- hibiscus
- hydrangea
- stargazer lilies

My 2007 gardening goals:
1. Replant coneflower and black eyed susans. They all but disintegrated by the end of the summer last year-- go figure.
2. Use annuals more effectively. Last year I tried new groupings of annuals, and I didn't think too many of them looked good. Back to the drawing board...

I'm still trying to decide on my three hanging baskets for the front porch. Should I go with ferns and chance my neighbor thinking I'm copying her, or should I use a mixture of cool colored annuals like I did last year?

Christmas in March

Thanks, Cousin Brady!

Vertigo

No, I'm not talking about U2.

I woke up at 4 a.m. with the room spinning as if I had been on a carousel for the past six hours. It was back-- the vertigo.

I can't remember ever having a normal inner ear. I was the little girl who could never roll down a grassy knoll or spin on a merry-go-round or even perform a somersault. I always got dizzy.

About seven years ago I took medication daily for this annoying ailment. I've stopped the meds, and now I never know when it's going to strike.

When Mike and I started dating I was in Lansing to meet some of his friends for the first time. I had to sleep in the car in the restaurant parking lot before joining them for dinner inside. And while shopping with friends, I remember countless times when I had to "sleep it off" in the car outside the mall. I think my Indianapolis friends got to the point where they didn't even bat an eye if I had to go sleep after being in a car. "Yeah, Traci's in the bedroom....sleeping again. She'll be out in about 20 minutes..."

But let me just say, now that I'm a mom, it's not so fun. Well, it never was fun....you know what I mean.

Mike had to take a sick day. The kids were out of their routines. And I was completely out of commission.

As Mike says, "If Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy."

We'll hope for a better day tomorrow.

Three Year Old Theology

While making banana bread with Jonah this afternoon I was singing "This Little Light of Mine." I really didn't know I was singing until Jonah asked, "Who's satan?"

I was a shocked until I realized I was singing another verse to the song, "Don't let satan blow it out, I'm going to let it shine..."

"He's bad, " I said. I know, it was a terrible response. His question surprised me.

Jonah paused. "Where does he live?"

At this point I didn't really know what to say so I just said, "He lives in hell. "

"Help?"

"No hell." I quickly changed the subject. "Let's talk about Jesus."

He paused. "Where does Jesus live?"

"He lives in heaven."

Mike corrected me later, telling me I should have said, "inside your heart." So my theological response wasn't completely appropriate, but c'mon, I was baking bread, trying to keep Jonah from making too much of a mess with the flour, and stepping over Lydia as she was scooting herself backwards across the kitchen floor; I wasn't exactly prepared to give the best answers to my inquisitive three year old.

We immediately started singing again... saving theology for another day.

Just when I thought it was over...

We've been overwhelmed the past few days with the van-load of items Mike brought back from Indiana. We thought the house was mostly cleared, but we had forgotten about a room we filled with family heirlooms. Here are some of the items we've recently added to our basement:

- Linda's wedding dress. It's GORGEOUS.
- A steam engine
- Grandpa Keith's coat from the Navy
- A few lifesize portraits of Mike as a child
- An antique highchair
- A few large framed pictures of ancestors
- Eyeglasses, pajamas, coins, a globe, hangers...
- A garbage bag full of women's vintage clothing
- ...and a host of other things I was too overwhelmed to view

Of course, none is as interesting as the statue of Jesus that Alex brought to their house that's "good for hiding money in."

Any one have any desire for some lifesize pictures of Mike? He actually suggested using them for our next white elephant gift exchange.

Just the Boys

After two years, the house where Mike grew-up finally sold. They're closing this week so the boys (including Jonah) took a trip to get the few remaining items in the house and spend one last night reminiscing of childhood. I know it will be emotionally hard, but I think Mike was also very anxious to have fun with Jonah, allowing him to create some of his own memories of walking in the woods and playing games next to the fireplace.

In honor of their trip, we dressed Jonah in Mike's Southwood Little League t-shirt we found when cleaning out Mike's old room. It even has our last name on the back.

I trust it will be a special time for all of them.

Buddies

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The Power of Words

My brother and I have always been good friends. Although I remember being occasionally annnoyed, I can't remember a time when I was truly angry at him. Now that we're adults, we think we've discovered why:

We had no choice.

Our parents, for as long as we can remember, always told people, "Traci and Troy don't fight. They always get along." I guess we grew up believing it. And after a while, we had a reputation to uphold.

We joke about it with our parents now, but it does cause me to ponder the power my words will have on my children. Jonah is obviously difficult, but I never want him to hear me say it. I never want him to hear me say that he "drove me crazy today" or that he's a "wild man." I want him to hear me tell other people that "he was a good boy today" or that "I'm so proud of him."

I hope my words are powerful.

My parents' words were.

This Week

This week Jonah loves:
- maze books
- his Grammy (some things never change)
- chewing gum
- playing on the computer
- naked "hot laps" around the house before bathtime
- studying maps from our December vacation to Orlando


This week Lydia loves:
- her Pop
- biting on board books
- cottage cheese
- zerberts on her tummy
- watching Jonah do just about anything

A New Hobby

For the past month, I've been mildly obsessed with looking for kids' clothes on eBay. After the kids are in bed, I can't wait to get online to "shop" for good deals. The irony is that I've only won three items after spending countless hours navigating through the site.

I'm looking for truly great bargains. After placing my maximum bid, I stop if the price goes any higher. That's why I haven't won too many!

I'm trying a new technique tonight-- it's a free sniping service that will place my first bid 10-20 seconds before the auction is over. I'm hoping to win a lot of 4T shirts in EUC (that's Excellent Used Condition for those who are unfamiliar with eBay acronyms). We'll see if it works.

So pardon me...

I've got some shopping to do.

Picture This

There are two loud screams as we both duck to the ground. The evil creature circles the living room at no less than 45 mph (I never exaggerate). I dodge into the bedroom, peering through a crack in the door. Mike jousts the air with a dustpan. He hits the bat; it's still flying. Now he holds the dustpan in the air. The bat hits it during its maddening loop around the room. It's still flying... but slower. Mike fans the air with the dustpan weapon. The bat pummels to the ground, looking like a wad of wet tissue paper--lifeless and rabid, lying on my floor.

Mike, a.k.a. my hero, picks up the beast with the edges of two newspapers and tosses it in the outside garbage can. I'm repulsed but I laugh. Another one bites the dust.

Perhaps we need to try Dwight's garbage bag approach next time.

Hibernation is almost over. Scratching sounds in our ceiling will commence.

So who wants to come visit?

What's on Your iPod?

Here's what's on mine:

A Special Day

We'll always think of February 14 as more than Valentine's Day. Today is Larrie's birthday. He would be 69. We were reminiscing this morning about his last birthday party. Mike had planned a gathering at the nursing home with his best friends. He died eight days later.

My how proud, overjoyed, and ecstatic he and Linda would be with the addition of two beautiful granddaughters this year. I'm sure he'd be planning several trips to teach Jonah how to fish and probably wondering when he could get Lydia and Davy in camouflage.

So we celebrate Papa Larrie (that's how we refer to him with Jonah) today.

What Not to Wear

When I have the chance, I love to watch What Not to Wear on TLC. As I stood in front of my barren closet this morning, I wondered, what would Stacey and Clinton say about me?

"I see 6 pairs of black or grey yoga pants in this closet. This girl needs to learn that she can be comfortable and still wear tailored, stylish clothes."

"Look, Clinton, she's got a white t-shirt for every day of the month."

"While fleece is comfortable and warm, cashmere can meet her needs too."

"No, you don't have to wear your tennis shoes everyday. Try paying for a pair of comfortable shoes."

"This girl thinks jeans and a t-shirt are dress-up clothes."

I need help.

A Rare Moment, Indeed

Before school this morning...

Our Little Miss Sunshine

My Brain

I think I'm a fairly smart person; I feel I have a good mind. But when it comes to certain things, my brain just doesn't work. Let me give a few examples:

federal taxes
car parts
stocks
medical insurance

My brain can't comprehend them.

I get to a certain point and then, POOF, my mind literally goes blank. I can't make any connections and nothing makes sense.

This becomes a problem when I'm trying to talk to a mechanic or the insurance company. I told a woman today that "what you just said was Greek to me."

I actually said it. Why pretend to understand? She explained it again, and well, I still didn't understand. Of course, at that point I felt the need to say, "Oh, okay."

I have no idea what she was talking about.

I believe there are certain things that I should handle and certain things that Mike should handle. Taxes, cars, money, and insurance are four things Mike should handle.

He thinks it's a learning opportunity for me to take care of them--

Just wait until I make a mistake.

So Proud

Since 2000, Mike has poured his heart into the new student center. Many of you have been involved in the process from a distance so I thought I would post some recent pictures.


Picture 2: You can see the mezzanine in the distance. The mezzanine houses the gaming room with couches, a Nintendo Wii, and other gaming equipment that I'm too old to know anything about. You can also faintly see the light of the kitchen on the other side of the gym.


Picture 3: On the left side, there are pool tables, ping pong tables, etc. The unfinished stage is in the distance.



I am so proud of my husband. Not only did he raise the money for this 1.1 million dollar facility, but he used the money wisely and gave this community more than I think many people ever thought possible. Of course, he would be the first to tell you that God made it happen. And while that's very true, I also believe that Mike's vision and business sense were instrumental in the process.

We've already enjoyed letting Jonah run wild at "Daddy's work" on cold Sunday afternoons. He puts on his Lightning McQueen helmet and pads, and we have a little daredevil in the skatepark!

A Simple Request

This was our conversation this morning.

Me: So Jonah, you know I'll buy you a big present when you start going poop on the potty all the time. What do you want?

Jonah: A pogo stick

Me: That's what Pop and Grammy are going to buy you. What do you want from Mommy and Daddy?

Jonah: New socks

*******
Hmmmmm....
I think I can manage that.

Message

Ray

While labeling Lydia's six month pictures this morning, I became overwhelmed with her name. Lydia Ray is named after my grandpa, Raymond Edward. All of a sudden, I had tears streaming down my face with a huge grin, just thinking about how proud he would be of my kids.

Grandpa died eight years ago, and a little before that time at a point when he was "complaining" that none of his grandchildren were named after him, I promised him that one of my kids would be his namesake.

You see, there was something special about him. He was manly. He was big and strong. He was strong-willed. He was set in his ways. He was the patriarch, and he was respected as such.

Yet he was never intimidating to me. I knew he would give me the world-- which to a 10 year old that meant Lucky Charms, Pepsi, or a buck for a "Big Mac."

He was a fisherman. He wore a handkerchief behind his neck and tucked in his ears to keep the gnats from bugging him. He hated pizza. He taped Young and the Restless when his bowling league interfered with it. He constantly worked in the yard. He liked to wake us up by tickling our lips with paper. He smoked cigars. The employees at Wendy's knew his order when he walked in the door.

These are some things I remember about my grandpa.

I so wish he could put Jonah "in the vice" or Lydia could sit on his lap.

He must smile everyday just watching his family. We surely smile when we think about him.

My Dear Jonah

After two exhausting days with my dear Jonah, I've been thinking a lot about my parenting. Until Lydia was born, I think I doubted that I was a good mother. Jonah was so difficult that I often wondered if I made him that way. Did I give in? Not much. Did I baby him too much? No. Did I let him control me? Not really. It wasn't until I had Lydia that I discovered a lot of Jonah's behavior wasn't because of my parenting but because of his temperament.

As parents, I think it's really easy to judge other moms and dads. It's easy to say, "That kid needs more discipline" or "Man, that child needs some attention," or even, "Those parents need to be more strict." But I've learned that you can be a wonderful parent and still have a difficult child.

I do have an official diagnosis from therapists and psychologists (see Sensory Integration Dysfunction), but I still feel like a bad mom at times. Why can't my child behave like others? Then Lydia came along. She sleeps. She's content. She eats well. She plays well. And besides relaxing a little, I'm the same mom I was three years ago.

I know I can be a great mom, and he'll still throw tantrums, he'll still have difficulty with transitions, he'll still have trouble concentrating on his toys, he'll still have trouble sitting still, and he still won't respond well to discipline. I'm not trying to make excuses, but that's the way God made him.

It's hard. I try not to worry about the mom looking at us in the grocery store or the mom staring at us in the hospital waiting room. They don't know the whole story...

I guess it's a good lesson for all of us-- the homeless man, the screaming child, the defiant teenager....

We don't know the whole story.